I went to Lowe's to get vermiculite for my succulents. I really didn't mean to buy more plants. Honest.

But lookit this. FOR TWO DOLLARS. Could you have said no?



(Okay, that one's prettier than mine. Mine was a little sad. But I like them sad. Then I can fix them up!)

Also got one of these. It's just a single little guy now, but he'll grow!

So. I'm apparently addicted to succulents. Is there a support group somewhere?

OMG. They live!

( I didn't fail! )

I am proud. :D

Kidling cantered today. FOR THE FIRST TIME. :D

At our barn, we have a test that must be passed before a rider can canter. Riders must be able to do one full lap of sitting trot, no stirrups, and hands up off the neck. This demonstrates the core strength and balance necessary for a safe canter, as far as I'm concerned.

Kiddo usually rides a horse with a very, very rough trot. Not big and bouncy, just very jarring. He'd been saying for weeks that he thought he was ready to try the test, so yesterday, I pulled Mom-rank and told him to drop his irons - and do it noooooow. I coached him through it, and he didn't fall off! So that's good!

So today, in his regular lesson, he formally took his test, and at the end, he got to have his first canter. It was beauteous. :) The proud-mom is coming out, but he really did look good. Very in control, his posture was good, his heels were down... it was really nice.

The barn is good for this kid. I'm glad I found out.

Previous entry has been f-locked. Will be sure to post openly when we're in the clear, so that any lurkers know. :) Thank you all so, so much for your thoughts and prayers. I know they've been appreciated.

Now! I meant to post about my riding lesson on Tuesday, but got very sidetracked. Which is too bad, because it was a good one!

I was up on my mare again, and it was another flat lesson. The mare tends to be very heavy on her forehand, and the way I've been riding (combined with my physique, being short, heavy, and with a tremeeeeendous caboose) hasn't been helping. Tuesday, we hit upon the idea that I need to stop thinking 'arched back' like a good little rider; my body is such that even when I tilt my pelvis to pull my butt in, I still have a substantial arch. By thinking about 'sitting like a rider', I've been popping my ass back into the next county. This tips my upper body and encourages both the mare and I to collapse forward.

So! The mare, who bears down on the bit and generally dislikes stopping even on the best of days, is put in a worse position because of me - and I, who already tips a little because of my wee arms, am put in a worse position because of her. Tuesday was all about making us both better.

By god, it worked. I spent the entire lesson mentally chanting 'tuck your butt... tuck your butt...' and elevating my sternum. And boy, that mare was stopping like a champ. Well, not like every other normal horse in the world, but for her? It was pretty awesome. She was lifting herself just as I was lifting myself, tucking her haunches as I was tucking mine, and I had better control than I ever have.

Today, still, every muscle from my lower back to my knees is aching. I bet that's a good thing. :D

I don't know what it is about Saturday nights, but I just can't fall asleep. Even when I know I have to get up at 6:30am Sunday.

Was a decent day; the geldings had a case of the sillies, and two of them tried to yank my arms off in the pasture when I was turning them out. So much for my tendonitis feeling better today. Kidling had a lesson, and he looked to be riding well, and I had Taco Bell for lunch. That was exciting. Eh.

I remember getting home, and putzing around on the computer, then going back upstairs to find my husband working away on his laptop on the couch. I was talking to him about something and remember him asking if I was okay. I sighed something about being sleepy, then argued about whether or not I'd go to bed. And then I remember waking up on the couch two hours later, all tucked in with a blankie and pillow.

I guess I lost the argument. :D

My friends are now trying to get me to go back to school for a vet tech degree, which sounds awfully nice and sensible, excepting the fact that we are bajillions of dollars in debt. At some point, our credit card companies are going to notice and start jacking our interest rates. The idea of getting still more loans in order to pursue another degree, knowing that I have shitty follow-through when it comes to academic bullshittery, makes me cringe. Yes, being a vet tech would be delightful. I think I'd be good at it, and I'd enjoy it. But right now? Probably not in the cards.

Let's see, what else. OH. Going to Vegas at the beginning of November, which I'm excited about. Mom and Stepdad's birthdays are the same weekend - he's turning the big 6-0 - and they want to take a trip and bring my brother. He's not old enough to go casinoing, so I'm coming along to hit the arcades with him. Will be a very nice excuse to step outside of my life for a few days.

That's it! Brain is empty, and I'm remarkably not currently pissed off about anything. What a nice feeling!

Oh look. Another report card from the kiddie.

A C D+ D F F

Guess how many teachers have called me? None. Guess how many times he's been kept after class/during lunch/after school to complete missing work? None.

I know my kid is screwing up, but god damn it, I'm tired of the educational system failing my child. Year after year, it's the same fucking thing. No contact. Nothing.

And what does the school say? Generally: I think your child would benefit from medication.

No. I think my child would benefit from you all doing your jobs.

*sigh*

Sorry, guys. I'm a big big big advocate of the public schools, and I'm a huge supporter of my child's teachers. I vote for levies and pay hikes, I thank them at every possible opportunity. But I am sick of this bullshit.

Year after year, it's all the same. My child failing because of a system that's failing him. It's all bullshit.

ETA: Just requested an enrollment packet for a local internet-based school. Have looked at it before, and have liked it, but thought that this year was going fiiiiine. You know, not having heard from any teachers about potential problems or anything. But it's clearly not going fine. We may be 'home schooling' very soon.

Behind the cut, some pictures from the New Albany Classic on Sunday.

( Horsies! )

Enjoy!

I decided to make real foods today. And it worked!

Had been planning for the past week to make a chicken; last time I tried to cook a whole chicken, it didn't quite turn out right. That was years ago, and I figured it was high time I tried again. Roasted it with salt, pepper, and rosemary on a bed of potatoes, carrots, celery, and onion. Stuffed the cavity with apples and put it in a 400F oven for about two hours. And lo, it was good.

So good that Mimi jumped up on the stove and helped herself while we were eating. Heh. BUT STILL. :D

Also ended up buying strawberries from the store today, since they were on sale. Often times, they go uneaten and forgotten, so I decided to use one of the packages right away and make them into sundae topping. I was kinda shocked that it worked. Hubby says it was tasty, which is good enough for me.

(PS. Cooking while on Vicodin is a careful endeavor. Yes.)

In other news, kidling went to a friend's house after school. They ended up across the street at a park, generally unsupervised, with dozens of other children. One child, a little girl, "went after" kiddo, to hear him tell it. He thinks she was only five or so, so he didn't try to defend himself, but it was pretty bad. He has bite marks on his back. I am angry at this child's guardians, and I wish I knew who they were. I'm trying not to be angry at his friend's parents, because these kids are in seventh grade now and can't be supervised all the time. Still, I really wanted someone to be mad at. =\

Don't even know what lessons are to be learned here... other than "Beware rabid little girls on playgrounds".

On balance, though, the day ended up pretty okay. And I have half a chicken for the rest of the week.

I have succeeded in keeping my plants alive for weeks now. This is kinda exciting, guys. :D

Went to The New Albany Classic yesterday; for those of you either not in central Ohio or not into show jumping, it's a big one-day festival at the Wexner estate (they own, among other things, Limited Brands, Victoria's Secret, Abercrombie & Fitch, and a number of Olympic-caliber show jumping horses) where the central event is a major invitational grand prix. Total prize money this year was $75,000 for the top twelve places, along with a lease on a new Mercedes. It brings the big names every year - McLain Ward, Beezie Madden, Leslie Howard, Margie Engle, Mario Deslauriers, and so many others. This was my third year going, and the first time we got to see such brilliant riders right after their gold medals. ;) Very, very cool day with a fantastically exciting jump-off.

Tons and tons of pictures, but all on the other computer. Will have to post them soon.

Called about the Vet Assistant job, since I put in my resume' a month ago and have still heard nothing. The job IS still open, and they hope to be reviewing submissions later this week. Oh, good. Because this unemployed bullshit is lame and makes me all depressed and I start eating lots of chocolate. Well, I was on a diet.... (Fortunately, I seem to have kept the weight off, just haven't lost more. Not sure how, given how much I've been eating, but I won't complain.)

That's about it for my little world right now. I guess it'll do.

Thanks to tornangel012, I now have a whole family of plants. Four cuttings are trying to root as I type, and I caved in at Lowe's two hours ago - I was just there to buy some pots and soil! I swear! - and brought home a sick little fern.

I almost took a venus flytrap, wilty and $3, but didn't trust I'd have any clue how to raise one. And I thought maybe it would grow feeties and eat me in my sleep. So I passed.

I look over at my plants now and just smile. So green and happy. Makes me a little giddy, for reasons I don't entirely understand. Maybe it's this nurturing crap that's been itching at me. Who knows?

The pathetic clearance violet and rosebush I got last week are doing well, by the by. I stop short of having conversations with them, but I'm sure I'll cave in at some point and tell them my life story. When nobody's here, of course.

Wish we had more windows. Or, you know, any. My patio door is getting crowded.

Ever since house-sitting for my riding instructor - she of the hundreds of plants - I've desperately wanted plants. Have tried having them in the past, usually killed them within weeks. Because I'm cool like that. But after caring for hers, I have this weird interest.

In two weeks, I've picked up three plants. Two violets and what I think is a tiny rosebush, all from the clearance racks at Krogers, where they were slowly dying. The newest violet just came home today, and I surprised myself by fussing over it like a new puppy.

I kinda want more. Lots more. Some without flowers, maybe.

Nobody lists unwanted plants on Craigslist. WHY NOT. :D

So, yes. Crazy plant lady is off to a good start.

Just got two bookcases and an amazing wooden kitchen cart for $40. I am in love.

Also: Wanted breakfast from Burger King. Their eggy cheesy wraps are tasty, yo. I couldn't find one before breakfast went off, though, so I did the only thing that made sense.

I came home and ate lots of cookies.

Ooog. Do not feel well.

Power came back about midnight last night. I was sad.

Funny things happen when the lights go out. People talk, and they listen. Today is the happiest I've been in a very long time.

Have declared Saturday evenings "Weekly no-power nights". If only I could shut off the obnoxious buzzing from nearby apartments, too.

Very sorry to see the stillness go.

Vague. Yes. Intentionally so, while I make sense of things.

We've been without power since 5pm yesterday, and there's no estimate on when we'll have power again.

Who'd have thought Ohio would see hurricane-force winds? Srsly.

So, hello from Starbucks outside of Columbus, where they have power! :D Hope everyone out there is well and safe.

I can't remember if I mentioned it among all the wangsting - I must have, surely! - but my shiny Cougar's transmission was going out. I've had the car a year and a half, spent too much on it in the first place, and now the transmission was toast. On average, $2k to replace. Frankly, not worth replacing, given that I was unhappy with the sportiness pretty darn quickly. I just didn't want the car anymore.

So the other day, I went online and found some used cars I was interested in, and yesterday, I called up the dealers. The chat went like this: "Hello, I see you have X car listed for $3000. I have a shiny, decent car that needs a transmission. I would like to bring this car in, leave it there, and drive home X car for $2000." And a few of them actually said, "Okay!"

Much to my delight, I found a great car, and I brought her home today.

( Meet Tallulah! )

:D

The mare's front foot is all healed up YAY!

And now she's lame on the hind.

I knew there was something wrong, I was grooming her before our light ride on Tuesday. I slid my hand down the back of her leg to pick her hoof, and moved to the other... and it was wrong. Thick, I couldn't even feel the tendon. Now, I'm not familiar with bowed tendons, but this is how I always imagined they would feel. So I took her out, got my instructor to look, and she said (with much hope in her voice) that maybe the mare was just stocked up from standing in her stall. Sometimes their legs get a little swollen from lack of movement.

But no. She's lame. Don't know what it is, might be a simple injury that'll heal up well. But it might not be.

I won't likely be riding her again any time soon.

So. Not. Fair.

Thanks, guys. A million times over.

I'm back on track and only ate one ice cream cone to get there. ;) It was a small! I decided those actually have negative calories. Really!

Oh, and funny story. My husband reminded me that we own a house. Durr. Our renters have told us they're moving out by the first of the year. If the market doesn't look good to sell, I may be taking a job back in our rural town and moving into the house after my time in Minnesota. Which, hell, if we can't sell it....

Would be very hard to find a job there. Still, it's 100% worth considering. Yes.

Many options. Am now back in a happy place to consider them all.

I would like to drown myself in a vat of ice cream please.

God, I feel awful. Today was going so well, too.

Just feel hopeless right now.

Have been informed today that my job is, in fact, over on Sept 5.

So now I only have two weeks left.

Can I panic now?

Been a rough few days. Terribly lonely and wondering how I'm going to get over it. Guess I'll have to... but still.

Heading home in less than a month, so that's good. September 20. Still need to start packing and shipping.

A barn friend who moved away to California last month was home this weekend. Had lunch with her, which was nice, and she's hoping to come back for the holidays. Perhaps I'll be back for the holidays, too. By now, she's back on a plane for California.

Was looking forward to riding the mare today, who was to be re-evaluated for soundness. But instead of having me hop up on her, my instructor had someone else do it. Right in front of me. I was upset at the time, but I think most of it was just... hurt. Still does hurt. This horse has been a huge part of my life for the past year and a half, and I haven't been able to ride her at all in more than a month - the month when, I think, I would have needed it most. Today just took the cake.

Meanwhile, I've lost a few pounds. Happy about that. I've been really, really struggling; depression and loneliness are impossible for me. But I'm generally refraining from random snacking and eating everything I can possibly find. So I'm proud of me. For all that I'm not eating, would be nice to see a bigger change, though. Boo.

Such is life, right?